Speech and Snow January 26, 2009

I had my first speech class today.  I am not thrilled with how much public speaking we will actually be doing.  I have to get up and give a short speech on Wednesday!  We were partnered up and we have to give our speech introducing our partner.  I missed the first day of this class so today was my first day and there was one other girl who was also coming in for the first time so we were put together.  She’s only 19 and it’s a little unnerving that her 2 younger siblings are Max’s age (13 & 14).  LOL  She’s a nice girl though and I think we’ll do okay.  It’s hard trying to get to know someone well enough to give a 3 minute speech in just a day or two.  The rest of the class has had nearly a week to work on it but I’m sure we’ll do fine. 

I am supposed to go back to class in the morning and we have winter storm warnings posted for our area so there is a good chance most of my classes this week will be cancelled.  This is very disappointing to me.  I finally got my books today and I’m ready to just jump in and start being a student and most of this week will be lost to the stupid weather.  Stupid weather…… *grumbles*  I can’t wait for spring!! 

I’ve been sitting here for a couple of hours trying to write an essay about myself.  It only has to be 5 paragraphs long but it’s really hard to do.  I am to choose 3 characteristics about myself to highlight and I can’t believe how difficult it has been for me.  I have pretty major self-esteem/self-worth issues anyway so writing an essay about myself is very uncomfortable and awkward.  I got the first paragraph down and started on the second but I had to stop and save it for tomorrow because I just can not get my thoughts together. I thought it would be such a simple assignment since I know the subject of the essay pretty well but I’ve started it 5 times and ended up tossing all 5 tries.  It has me a bit worried about writing my essays for the rest of the semester.  Will I struggle as much with them too?  I hope not.  It will be a long, miserable semester if this is what it’s going to be like until May!!  Hopefully tomorrow I’ll be able to find my rhythm and get the paper finished for Thursday.

I don’t have much going on right now besides school.  I am working on getting our van and truck registered and it’s taking forever to accomplish.  I needed a new tire on the van because one went flat and we got that taken care of on Saturday.  I was going to go today to the DMV but I needed a certain paper and I could not find it anywhere.  I can’t imagine what could have happened to it but it’s lost and I must have it to register the vehicles.  So I have to get a new one tomorrow after my classes, drive 30 minutes north to the DMV, wait for who knows how long (possibly hours) and hope that the people there don’t tell me I’m missing information and send me home.  And all this hinges on how much snow we end up getting.  If we get even 2 inches, I’ll be stuck at home because we have to go up very steep and very windy roads to get to/from town and snow makes driving out here dangerous.   I feel bad that I keep borrowing my MIL’s car, I was hoping I wouldn’t have to after today.  I have a feeling it’ll be closer to the end of the week before I get it all taken care of. 

So that’s all I have for today.  I’m tired and have class at 8:30am so I am going to go to bed early tonight.  Yes, 11pm is early for me.  LOL

First Day of School January 22, 2009

I always take pics of my kids on their first day of school, when they are ready to head to the bus stop.  I decided that I’m not all that photogenic at 7:30 in the morning so I’m skipping that tradition for myself.  LOL

I had my first class at 8:30am and since we live waaaay out in the country, I gave myself an hour to get there.  I ended up getting there at 8:00 and had half an hour to waste.  I have to readjust to the small town mind-set again and remember that there is no real traffic to speak of in this town.  I don’t like arriving at the school before the staff!!  My first class was Composition 1 and I think I’m going to like this class.  It’s all about writing- essays, research, reports, etc.  I’m pretty good with that kind of thing so I am very comfortable there.  I like the instructor too.  She’s very laid back and friendly and easy-going.  She seems to have a good sense of humor so that will make the class enjoyable.  I have to write a 5 paragraph essay about myself that’s due Tuesday.  Plus reading to do in the textbook.

Half an hour after that class is over I have Beginning Algebra Part 1.  Now, I am not a fan of math.  But that is mainly because I was never taught how to do a lot of the more complicated stuff.  Like algebra.  Once I learn how to do something, I’m good to go and my confidence level goes up.  Math has always intimidated me because I am math-ignorant.  I put off getting my GED for years because I knew I wasn’t good at math and it’s not something I can teach myself.  I am extremely good at self-teaching- most everything I know I taught myself.  Not so with math.

I have a fantastic instructor there too.  I like her a lot- friendly, kind, happy, good sense of humor.  I’m going to enjoy learning algebra I think.  We did some fraction review and then started talking about algebra vocabulary.  I took lots of notes and learned a lot today.  It’s kind of like learning a new language.  Algebra has it’s own set of rules and methods and orders and did I mention the rules??  I have soooo much to learn!!!  But so far, as with Comp., I’m feeling pretty good about the class.

My next class will be on Monday afternoon and that is Fundamentals of Speech Communication.  It’s required so don’t go thinking I took this for my own pleasure.  I can get up in front of people and give a speech.  Being one of Jehovah’s Witnesses has given me life-long practice in talking in front of people.  But at the same time, I have almost no self-confidence and I’m very ashamed of my size and feel very ugly.  So my first inclination is to hide, not be noticed and not call attention to myself.  To be honest, compared with most of my classmates so far, I’m not unattractive and there are heavier people than me. But I still don’t relish the thought of taking this class.  I hope it’s not as bad as I’m imagining!!

Let’s see….Comp. 1…. Algebra……Speech…..  what else?…..

Oh yes, I’m also taking Microsoft Applications and Intro to Psychology.  I haven’t memorized my registered classes or my schedule yet since everything has been so last minute at this school.  I start Speech on Monday and Psychology is on Tuesday evenings.  Wednesday evening is my Microsoft Apps. class.  I am looking forward to these two classes too.  I love computers so the Microsoft one is good.  I think it’s an in-depth study of Office 2007.   Psychology should be interesting.  I have no idea what we’ll be studying but some parts of that subject are really interesting.  I honestly just love learning.  I’m extremely curious by nature so this whole thing is perfect for me.  I actually had to suppress a grin in algebra today when the instructor was teaching us the vocabulary we have to remember.  LOL  I was just so excited to be learning something new!!  I have a crazy urge to giggle when I’m being taught something new.  For instance- years and years ago, when Dave and I were dating, he would pick me up in his father’s truck which was a standard.  I would sit next to him and watch him shift gears.  One day I asked if I could shift it for him and when he agreed to it, I started shifting at the appropriate times and I’d just sit there and giggle like a fool every time I shifted into 3rd or 4th or whatever.  But it was something new for me and that’s how I react!  (I annoy myself.  LOL)  I am slightly embarrassed to admit that I nearly giggled when I was learning ALGEBRA!!   Ugh!!  LOL

I have one more small hurdle to pass and then it’s smooth sailing with the school.  I am waiting for my financial aid to be sorted out so I can get my books.  The people at this school do not have their S together!!  They asked for something from CFCC in Wilmington to show I have no transcripts because I never attended classes so I had a woman fax the paperwork last week.  I was asked to have her fax the same thing to a different office at the main campus (why? I don’t know!) so she did that too.  I get a call today saying they need my transcripts from CFCC!  I told her that I don’t have transcripts and that the papers I needed faxed were sent last Wednesday and that I saw them myself in the counselors office last week.  She hasn’t called back so I’m really hoping she got it all sorted out.  I have homework due for next Tuesday and I need my books over the weekend to do the work.  Plus, it takes 20 minutes just to get to the main road several miles outside of town!  And then the campus is at the complete other end of town.  So it takes a lot of time and gas money to go back and forth, I want to make one trip and be done with it.  It should be done tomorrow at the latest.  Then I can stop thinking about it all and just concentrate on my schoolwork.   So far it’s been a good start though and I look forward very much to all of it.  I’m happy.

(I am going to try and update regularly here if possible.  Hopefully I’ll keep up with it.) 

Topsy-Turvy January 21, 2009

Wow, things have changed a lot for us since my last post.  (Way back in September!  Yikes!)

I’m writing this from my living room in West Virginia.   The economy has tossed Wilmington onto it’s backside and we became one of it’s many family’s victimized by it.  David ran out of work towards the end of October and there was no work to be had after that.  I’ve never seen it like this before.  Not even low-paying jobs available down there.  Just nothing.  We could not collect unemployment because Dave was self-employed so we were living on nothing and I’m sure you’d be shocked to find out that you can’t survive for very long on nothing!!  heh   We got food stamps and the medical card but nothing else.  We couldn’t pay our rent for December so our landlord asked us to move out.  He spoke to David on December 23rd and asked if we could be out by January 1st so he could get the place ready to rent ASAP and not lose much money.  Of course that left us with no time to figure anything out.  The next evening Dave called his parents and asked if they could help us.  His dad spoke to all of Dave’s brothers and everyone jumped into action.

We packed up our entire house (well, 90% of it) and were moved in with Dave’s parents in WV in just 3 days!!  I think that has to be a world record!   We went back to Wilmington the next week to get the rest of our stuff and clean the house a bit.  I had to find a new home for my cat because my in-laws don’t want indoor pets (they do not like cats either).  Plus, she had health problems and I just couldn’t afford to buy her special food and medication with Dave being out of work for so long.  My neighbor came to my rescue and took the cat for her parents who just lost their kitty.  It worked out perfectly!!

I have to say, I was devastated to be back in West Virginia.  It’s the last thing in the world I wanted or expected.  But, with the grace of God, I’m doing pretty good emotionally.  I was supposed to start school in NC on January 6th but I had to withdraw and drop everything at the last second.  I decided to take a look at what the local community college is offering here and I found my calling!!!  I have wanted to learn sign language for years and years.  As a young teenager I had a best friend who’s parents are deaf so I was exposed to it and have been fascinated by it for 20 years now.  Well, guess what the local community college offers????  Yes!  An Associate in Applied Science Degree in Sign Language/Interpreter!!  How shocking and awesome is that??  I’m so thrilled by this that I told David I was willing to give 2+ years of my life to WV in order to pursue this degree.  Plus, I can use this knowlege to help other Jehovah’s Witnesses because SL interpreters are desperately needed as there aren’t enough to fill the needs of the Organization.  I’ve found my calling!!

I’ve had to hustle to get everything worked out in order to start this semester and I was —>this<— close to being forced to wait until summer.   But with Jehovah’s blessing (seriously, it is shocking that I can start now because of the ‘issues’ I’ve had this past week with paperwork), I am registered for classes and will start tomorrow morning.   I am beyond excited and feel like this is where I belong despite how badly I felt when I found out we had to move back here.  I kept telling Dave that the move felt so wrong, everything about it felt so wrong.  Why was this happening to us?? Now I know why and I’m happy to be able to pursue this long-time dream of mine.

We are currently living back in the same apartment we left 3 years ago.  But my in-laws are planning to help us get a doublewide (their idea, they offered) to put on their property so we can have a place of our own and we won’t ever have to worry about having a place to live.  How cool are they?  Of course, a mobile home isn’t ideal but we can make it look good and it’ll be ours to improve all we want.  I’ll take whatever goodness comes our way, even if it’s not ideal or what we thought we wanted.  I’ve wanted to live in the country, away from people for the last couple of years and I’ve gotten exactly what I craved.  Not the state I would have chosen but jobless, evicted people can’t be choosers!  LOL

My girls are really happy in their new schools.  Madeline remembers kids from when we lived here before and she’s picked up where she left off with them and has fit in perfectly from day one.  Samantha is doing well too but the poor girl has been sick for the past 2 weeks.  She got a stomach bug and was throwing up and had the runs for a couple of days and when she recovered from that, a nasty cold had taken hold and she’s been trying to hack up her lungs for about 4 days now.  We give her cough syrup to keep the coughing to a minimum and I am really, really hoping it goes away on it’s own soon.

Max is struggling through his days with his school work.  Keeping focused is monumental and it takes so much to get him through each day’s subjects.  We often end up getting rather annoyed and it can take hours to get through 30 problems but we keep at it.  He wants to go back to public school because he liked the kids he went to school with here but I’m making him finish what we started this year.  Next year, in 8th grade, he can re-enroll in public school.   Sadly, I’ll have to put him back on meds and deal with all of the side effects from them but if it helps him get through his school work, so be it.

Elaina is just happy to have grandma’s attention all day, every day.  She spends as much time as she can manage surgically attached to her grandmother’s hip.  LOL  She’s as happy as she can be here.  And having snow to play in is just icing on her cake.

Before we left NC, Dave had some tests done and one came back saying his thyroid is underactive.  We were shocked by this because he has no symptoms of it.  He’s developed some pain in his neck (like a sore throat but it’s not a sore throat- it’s strange…) since we got here.  He started on meds yesterday and I’m hoping it relieves his pain.  I am worried though that we don’t have medical insurance here.  He’ll need follow-ups to check his thyroid levels and if his pain persists, I’m afraid he’ll need tests to check for nodules on his thyroid.  It’s an expensive disorder when you have no insurance.  I’m going to not give it too much thought right now so I don’t get myself upset over what may or may not happen.

Life is interesting.  To be sure.  ‘Box of chocolates’ and all that.